Tearful over fish? whatever next…

by Hannah

I don’t think of myself as an overly emotional person. Don’t get me wrong I am not a hard faced woman without emotion, I just mean I don’t get upset or cry at things that maybe other women might do. For example if a soppy film is on, I will develop a rather large lump in my throat rather than blubber around people. If I am on my own, then that’s another matter entirely. Crying at a particularly heart wrenching episode of Eastenders needs to be done strictly in private. I can’t remember when that was, but I assure you there was at least one episode!

 

Now back to my point. I don’t get upset easily so the mix of hormones raging around my body at the moment has taken me by surprise. Yesterday I got upset over fish. My colleague was talking about a time he returned home to the Philippines for several weeks and locked his bedroom door in his shared house. What he had forgotten about was the fish he owned that would need feeding. It wasn’t until he had boarded his flight that he realised he hadn’t left his room key with his housemate, meaning there was no means of her feeding the fish in his absence. When he returned from his holiday, wracked with the guilt of leaving them to starve, he found their skeletons floating in the tank. As a person he is very flamboyant and camp, so this got him quite emotional dredging up the memories and he wafted at his eyes to stop them streaming. What surprised me was how I joined in and my eyes well and truly welled up, our other colleague thought we were nuts.

I have heard how pregnant women can get emotional over the slightest thing on the telly, even baby adverts! I don’t see that happening with me or at least I never dreamt that would happen to me. Now maybe I am not so sure. I wasn’t this emotional when pregnant with Beastie, that I can recall, my husband may think otherwise. I couldn’t watch scary films and I used to be a big fan of scary flicks. My husband couldn’t for the love of god get me to watch the latest Saw film, yet I happily watched the preceding films pre ‘with child’. Since my first pregnancy I have been acutely more aware of my own mortality and what would happen to Beastie if I or my husband weren’t around. Driving around in the car is even different, before I used to put my foot down much more. Did I not care if I had a crash and what would happen to my family? I am sure I did but nothing made me stop and think like I do now. Every move I make now I think about the repercussions and how a little boy (plus bump) depends on me and will do for a fair few years yet. It’s scary but yet it’s a natural part of being a parent, something definitely shifts in your brain.

You get warned about lots of aspects of motherhood and what to expect. However, I don’t remember being warned about the prospect of becoming a wimpy Mummy. I have lost my nerve with lots of fun things, go karting and hardcore scary films to name but a few…and now? now I am reduced to tears over fish.

4 comments

Katie @mummydaddyme 12th October 2011 - 8:36 pm

I am a hugely emotional person and cry at everything but I was worse when I was pregnant. That story about the fish made me feel sad as well, what a horrible way to go!

I have become acutely aware of things more since having Mads, in fact I would go as far to say that I am a little irrational about things- I get a lot more panicked than I used too about silly little things. In some ways I wish I wasn’t like it.

Its funny cause when I was younger I used to love horror films, me and my friends would spend ages watching the scariest films we could find but since my mid twenties I literally can’t watch them at all- they freak me out and make me feel sick! x

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Mummybeastie 12th October 2011 - 8:42 pm

Ha I am glad someone sympathises with the fish story. I managed to contain the tears, you know when you try really hard to keep them in pooled in your lower lids!

I find I imagine horrible scenarios and what I would do in that situation, I have no idea why! it’s taking being prepared to a whole new level.

I feel sick too and they play on my mind a lot more. I haven’t been able to watch those paranormal films as one of the trailers has a baby in a cot *shivers* x

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Multiple Mummy 13th October 2011 - 9:07 pm

Oh yes emotions are a funny thing during pregnancy. Like you I am not a teary person, not hard but I am always either optimistic or the one that has to take control, so no room for my own tears, however weird emotions was how I knew I was pregnant with Noah. I went to the science technicians at work to ask for some geraniums and they said they didn’t have any as it was the wrong time of year. I burst into tears like they told me the world was going to end. So unlike me. I brushed it off as time of the month but I know my technician had her suspicions from then. x

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Mummybeastie 13th October 2011 - 9:28 pm

It’s always over the most random triggers, I bet it makes you laugh now. The thing is you know you are being over emotional but it just takes over! x

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