Evenings? remind me what they are?

by Hannah

When I talk about evenings, I am referring to that part of the day where you generally sit down and chill out. Although that may not always be the case, it could mean going out to eat, drink, dance or anything. Mainly though I wrongly assumed that evenings would be the time I could regain some me time. How wrong was I.

We knew what we were getting ourselves into when we decided to have children. Well as much as you think you know, as no one really knows what they are getting themselves into until that time arrives. As our luck would have it, Beastie decided that he didn’t much like bedtime or his bed until pretty much recently and it’s still touch and go sometimes. He’s now almost four, so that’s four years of having our evenings interrupted entertained by a little person. Then we thought it would be lovely to double the fun with another little person and in the back of my mind I thought he might be somewhat calmer than his brother. When in actual fact he paints his older brother in a much better light. I know that as time goes by, we tend to forget details and maybe look back with rose tinted spectacles saying ‘oh he wasn’t that bad’ or ‘I don’t remember him doing that’. When in actual fact he probably was but we’ve decided to not remember that aspect.

So although we look back and try our hardest to fathom what Beastie was doing at this age, we know that he wasn’t staying up until midnight on a regular basis. This takes gate crashing our evening to a whole new level. Is it really too much to be able to watch Coronation Street in peace? It’s only on for half an hour at a time. Yes, I know you are thinking I could Sky+ it and I do but I am not sure why as I never catch up. Instead I have got used to gathering the gist of what is going on through lip reading and face expressions. Relaxing it is not. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I have pressed rewind only for the boys to get even louder. Then I remember that it’s not real life and I should get a grip. Still we all like a bit of escapism sometimes. Friends or the Big Bang Theory fulfils that mainly – easy to watch as they are repeated, repeatedly!

I think it’s a combination of us being rubbish at instilling bedtime routines and the fact we have extremely wilful children. We all have our troubles at some point with children and no child is an angel, right? I often see people update their statuses on twitter and instagram about their kids being tucked up in bed, these nuggets of information are usually accompanied by a picture of them holding a glass of wine in their hand. Jealous, not much.

Although some days we feel like tearing our hair out, I always remind my husband and myself that this stage won’t last and that these small people depend on us right here, right now. One day we’ll be trying to coax moody teenagers out of their bedrooms and agonising over them having flown the nest, desperately wishing we could turn back time. I remind myself of this, still it’s pretty tough at times…and then I see how much joy they really bring us and what else would I blog about? Well, probably lots as it will be such a novelty having spare time. I might even read books or maybe become a crafting extraordinare? *cough*.

8 comments

lucy at dear beautiful 25th January 2013 - 10:42 am

Oh hun, that really sucks. I think that me time is often what gets you through the really demanding times. We are going through a tough sleeping patch with the little lady at the moment and it is near killing me. But I have definitely chosen to forget about doing these same phases with the little man.
I’m pretty lucky that my kiddos have always gone to bed really well in the evenings, in fact I know I pushed her to do go to sleep on time a lot earlier that I did with her brother, mainly because I had learned how valuable to adult time was.
I wish I had some advice for you. I reckon if you really played hardball with a strict bedtime routine then you could crack it, but hardball just isn’t very fun. We’re trying it at the moment and its tough to keep up when result aren’t immediate. X

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Mummybeastie 25th January 2013 - 10:47 am

Yes I think, knowing that no matter how much they test you during the day, come bed time you can breathe a sigh of relief! It’s few and far between at the moment. I reckon hardball is the only way too but what we have found is that it’s hard going when you have another one. The screaming shenanigans of one sets the other off and I know that the fact we are on one level in the flat can’t be helping! I hope it all goes well with the little lady, start them young! (should take my own advice). x

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Not My Year Off 25th January 2013 - 2:20 pm

Think I can completely sympathise with you – on my work days I get home at 7pm most days and then its a mental rush of dinner for us, bath and bed for toddler and he’s usually getting hyper rather than winding down so by the time he’s actually in bed asleep and I’m back downstairs its usually past 9 and then I need to clean bits, get red for the next day and I want to just sit and stare at the telly or my phone but I zonk out….then complain I have no “Me” time! I hope you get your evenings back soon (and that I start getting home well before 7pm!)

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Mummybeastie 29th January 2013 - 12:22 pm

Yes I’m finding that my eldest is getting hyper around that time too, just when you want them to be settling! It’s an endless cycle of cleaning and tidying and that leaves very little time for relaxing! I hope you start to get home sooner so you can have some more time too 🙂 x

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Katie @mummydaddyme 26th January 2013 - 2:50 pm

This is the one thing that makes me nervous with a new baby. At the moment i am sat here and it is afternoon nap time, I am just relaxing and lying on the sofa. I can 99.9% guarantee as well that Mads will go down at 7 on the dot and not wake until 8am the next day. I get a huge amount of time to myself, in fact more than I did before as I am not working.
But in just three short weeks, I will have a newborn, one that is completely unpredictable, won’t go down at regular times, and certainly won’t go down at 7 in the evening and not wake until morning! And while I can’t wait to meet her now, I am nervous as I relish these times to myself! I hope that Baby Beastie cracks it soon, but if not at least I will be joining you and giving you much needed sympathy in a few weeks! 😉 x

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Mummybeastie 29th January 2013 - 12:23 pm

You may be lucky Katie (once the initial newborn stage has passed) and have another good sleeper! I reckon she’ll be just like her big sister! x

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Karen 28th January 2013 - 10:33 am

Oh hon, I feel for you. Just having a few evenings interrupted because Daisy has a cold is killing me. We need that time to stay sane. All I can say its not to late to get strict and set a new routine in place. good luck oh and when i get some energy back I dream of being crafty too 🙂 xx

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Mummybeastie 29th January 2013 - 12:25 pm

Sorry to hear you have been having some bad evenings too. At the moment I think it’s more illness that is causing grief and the fact we have 2 sharing a room. We’ve been putting routines into place but they’re resistent! x

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