I am sat here with a spare moment to actually sit at the laptop and give my poor blog some attention. My husband is at work, Beastie is taking a nap and Baby Beastie is also taking a nap snuggled up next to me (in between feeds) so I have a window of opportunity which needed grabbing with both hands. Will I finish the post I wonder? He’s stirring.
As most of you will already know I became a proud Mum once again to a beautiful baby boy nearly 4 weeks ago and I am still trying to find my feet. I am learning how completely amazing it is to have two gorgeous children but also how impossible some days can be to meet their demands. It’s early days I know and I know that I will adapt just like I adapted when Beastie was born. A month has flown by and already life has changed so much.
I feel pretty much back to normal in myself, recovery wise from my caesarean. I have had some healing issues with my scar again but nothing too serious. All I need to do is to start driving again to feel fully normal and have my independence back again. I remember the daunting experience of taking Beastie out on my own for the first time, wondering whether I would manage to fix the car seat properly or whether I would have a fight on my hands with the pushchair. This time I have double the trouble, although my three year old is becoming increasingly useful. All I know is that first day being set loose with the car keys I will be leaving myself plenty of time to get wherever I plan to go, it could take me a fair while…
Of course what is different this time is that I simply can’t devote all my time to the baby, which is all part and parcel of being a Mum of more than one child. Luckily Beastie has really taken to his little brother. I wasn’t sure which way it would go but I am so proud of the way he has handled having to share me. He has not been without his tantrums and defiant behaviour but none of his anger has ever been directed towards his little brother. My heart swells when I see him tenderly stroking his head and holding his hand. It’s particularly cute when he goes up to him and says ‘hello darling’ or holds his hand when I am changing his nappy uttering ‘it’s ok baby, it’s only a poo’. This morning he was so chuffed to see his little brother with his eyes wide open that got up close to him and rubbed his nose against his. It’s incredible to see their bond developing.
Baby Beastie is thriving well and surprised us all with his weight gain. With each weigh in he has always put a decent amount of weight on and had no trouble getting back up to his birth weight in the first week. I am breast feeding again and like last time I wasn’t sure at first whether he was getting what he needed from me. He is quite a lazy feeder and has a tendency to ‘snack’ so it has been great to know that he has been getting the nutrients he needs. Having breast fed before and knowing the pitfalls and unpleasantries has made it all the more easier this time. Once you ride through the sore nipple stage and latching problems it’s much plainer sailing. It feels established now and that makes for a much happier Mummy. I always knew that I wanted to breast feed again and was always going to give it my best shot but you never know how it is going to work out second time around and no two babies are the same.
Having said that no two babies are the same, I think part of me thought I would get another little carbon copy of Beastie. When I heard Baby Beastie’s first cry I thought it so strange to hear a different cry to the one I have been used to, it was alien for those first few moments. That all changed almost immediately and now the cry is as familiar as Beastie’s was because he’s my child, just a different one. It’s sometimes hard to remember back to what we were doing three years ago and whether we have forgotten certain aspects, I am sure we have but I also know that there are a lot of differences this time. This time I have a very clingy baby, which is both lovely and extremely restrictive. So much so that in the last couple of weeks I have realised I am going to need a baby sling to wear around the flat and it wasn’t even a consideration last time. Beastie was fairly contented wherever we left him, not this time, Baby Beastie will scream blue murder if I leave him for a few moments. I also have a toddler to keep my eye on and as grown up as he might be, when I am out of the room I can never be sure of the babies safety. So it’s led me down the path of ‘baby wearing’ which I have never really had to think about before. There are lots of advantages and of course disadvantages but for this point in time I need to keep my baby close to me if that’s what he needs. I will also keep my sanity and be able to move around the home with two hands. Happy baby and Mummy hopefully. Let’s see how I get on…
Here are some photo’s of my boys 🙂
Ps. Baby Beastie is still asleep (success).