A guest post from the husband!

by Hannah
A guest post from the husband!

Women huh! You can’t live with them…..

Some of you know me, some of you know of me and some of you don’t know anything about me. Some of you probably thought Hannah had an imaginary husband the amount of times I appear in her photos (or lack of!). So here I am…

Me-and-boys

When it comes to Hannah’s blog I will do anything I can to support and help her out. We often discuss her blog which in turn leads to talking about other peoples posts and blogs. This gave me an idea to do a featured post on her blog, something which I haven’t really seen anyones partners do yet. This idea was based on a conversation we were having this morning about bodies, shapes, sizes and appearances. Luckily this doesn’t lead to arguments in our house as I will either pretend I don’t hear her or will just walk away…

Being a teenager in the 90’s, I had this image of what the perfect woman looked like. She was a mix of all of my favourite looking women; Carmen Electra, Pamela Anderson, Tiffani-Amber Thiessen (Kelly from Saved by the Bell!), Cindy Crawford, Jet from Gladiators, Louise Nurding (now Redknapp), Terri Hatcher, Michelle Pfeiffer, Jenny McCarthy, Jennifer Love Hewitt, plus I am sure there were more! They all had one thing in common, they were all slim, very petite, stunning to look at and in some cases surgically enhanced.

Because of this perception I had, I assumed that girls should look like that in every day life, despite the fact that these women actually have personal trainers, make-up artists, hair stylists and more who are paid to make them look like that.

I am not one of these men that will lie and say I was attracted to personality first, I wasn’t, I fell for Hannah based purely on her looks and appearance as she ticked all of the boxes of reminding me what the perfect woman looked like. I had never spoken to her or knew anything about her so I couldn’t know what her personality was like. The moment I first saw her I had this new feeling I had never had before, something told me that she would be the person I was going to end up marrying. She was slim, pretty, had a great figure, I was instantly attracted to her, the only thing I didn’t know was what she was like past what I could see with my eyes.

Hannah-Collage

Fast forward a fair few years and since the birth of my firstborn, not only have my perceptions changed but also what I think the ideal woman looks like in my eyes. This won’t be the same for all dad’s/men out there, this is just from my perspective.

After she had given birth to our eldest, when she was finally out of those god awful looking nursing bras and huge pants to boot, I saw something different. I can’t explain why but I started to see her differently now, seeing what she had just gone through and feeling so helpless that I couldn’t share the pain or take any of it away.

I instantly felt closer to her, more attracted to her, I wanted to be closer to her at every opportunity. I saw her post baby body differently to how she did, I saw it as curvy in the right places, her scars, the imperfections, the way her stomach now sat differently because of the mess that was made after her emergency c-section. I saw all of these things as how I think a real woman looks. The only way I can describe it is when you are child and you cut your knee and you end up with this awesome looking scab that you know will eventually turn into a scar that you can boast to your mates about (now you can see why I don’t write as I struggle using the right terminology!). This was the way I now see my wife and in part changed my views on how other women looked.

No longer was I this critical, judgemental man who if he saw a woman not looking like a 90’s sex symbol would snigger to himself. I am not saying I go around eyeing up other women, but if I see someone on TV, walking down the street, in the shops, its human nature to look and notice, just don’t get caught doing it! I knew it was wrong to cast judgement but I am like most red blooded males, we see with our sexual thoughts a lot of the time and it doesn’t enter our minds what that woman has been through in her life to look the way she does.

After being together for nearly ten years now, we have been through a lot, there have been bumps along the way which kind of describes what we look like! Hannah’s appearance might not be deemed as ‘perfect’ to the rest of the world but her appearance is perfect in every way through my eyes. I love the way she looks both in and out of clothes.

I will never forget this one day we went shopping to Westfield in London, I was walking behind Hannah by a few metres (as she wouldn’t wait!), I was walking with our then youngest and our eldest with Hannah. A couple of guys walked past Hannah and did the classic look back to check out her behind, they then turned back and looked at each other and said ‘niiiiiice’… They didn’t notice me, but I felt lucky and had a smile on my face. I didn’t need reassurance as I already knew how good she looked, but it was nice that other people who didn’t know her, were checking her out, because in her eyes those days of going out and being noticed were gone.

The best part of the day is always the start of it, it starts the same way, watching Hannah getting ready in the mornings…We are not prudish in our house and think nothing of walking around naked, that’s how we are. We are not exhibitionists by any means, but we are also not adults who try and hide and shy away from each other. Because of this, I get to see her beautiful body in the flesh every morning, you can’t beat a start to your day seeing something that looks that good.

You may think I am biased and/or pervy, but imagine yourself living with your secret crush and not checking them out! I married mine and in a world where people have never been more scrutinised for the way they look, I think that’s pretty awesome. I am proud to say she is not stick thin, with boobs pushed up to her chin, as the curves she has and the imperfections to compliment them are what makes her a real woman. I just wish she would see her body the way I do and not care so much about what other think. This is Hannah, how I see her.

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There is no one size fits all, so whilst you may not love the body you now have post baby/s, I am pretty sure your partner does and sees you, how I see my wife.

Nb. This is a guest post by Alex, Hannah’s husband. All thoughts and opinions are my own. You will also know that this isn’t a post by Hannah, because she really didn’t want me including that last picture of her!

10 comments

Kara 8th April 2016 - 6:49 pm

This has to be the best blog post I have read in years.
Alex how you talk of your wife is just beautiful. Such adoration.
I love how honest and frank you are. Explaining how you have changed.

You have taken the most beautiful photo of Hannah and I hope she sees that. I hope she hears what you have written as it is so hard when you are not kind to yourself to believe others.

But Hannah I can honestly say I believe everything Alex has written you can hear the truth xx

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Hannah 8th April 2016 - 8:35 pm

That’s such a lovely thing to say, thank you so much Kara from both of us. Alex wanted to be open and speak as he does to me.

Sharing private photos is not something that I am used to but he rightly convinced me that the photo worked well with the piece. He’s always been pretty good at reassuring me that to him, I’m fine! That’s all I need really xx

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Martin 8th April 2016 - 7:32 pm

Alex, unlike many who will read this post about your beautiful wife I know you (too well! not far short of 30 years) and I know how much of a genuine and humble person you are deep down…despite the clown on top. reading this bought a tear to my eye, every woman deserves to hear these words spoken to them by their partner and I couldn’t agree more! If you love the woman you are with then after child birth you love them and their figure more as that was your child’s home for the first 9 months. any stretch marks or scars they have are part of the love you have for each other and the life you produced together! Well done, you may not be a writer but I think you’ve expressed yourself amazingly

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Hannah 8th April 2016 - 8:47 pm

Hi Martin, thanks for having a read! Ha ha, that did make me laugh about the clown on top 🙂 He’s done a wonderful job of getting his views across and he put a lot of thought into it.

You old softy! You clearly share the same sentiments as Alex and it’s great to hear of your heartfelt respect too. One of the good guys x

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Jenny Paulin 8th April 2016 - 10:02 pm

awwwww this is amazing , a really joy to read. what a totally amazing hubby you have Hannah. I just loved this post and to hear things from a male point of view. you still look beautiful. i love his honesty here – i would love to read more posts like this xx

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Hannah 9th April 2016 - 3:51 pm

As I said on twitter, it’s so lovely to hear what you think and thanks so much for your kind words. It was written with complete honesty, as my husband only speaks the truth…I know where I stand at least! Thanks for sharing too 🙂 xx

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Karen 9th April 2016 - 8:28 am

Aaahhh this is so lovely and your right, I don’t think many husbands do guest posts. What a lovely read and so honest, I believed every word. I agree with jenny would love to see more posts like this. xx

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Hannah 9th April 2016 - 3:53 pm

I don’t think there are many that talk so frankly about the way their partners look to them. I’m glad that his tone came across well, because it came from the heart (cheese!). That’s interesting to know that like Jenny, you’d love to see similar posts xx

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liska 10th April 2016 - 10:06 am

Oh my God I adore this post. It’s not February nor is it Valentine’s Day but this couldn’t possibly be more romantic. This is lush. So great that you love each other so much inside and out. I really enjoyed reading this. Been with hubby 28yrs and it’d be a dream come true if he wrote this. You must be so so very proud of him. As he clearly is of you. Unlike a magazine he sees you minus photoshop but his adoration isn’t any less. Love how candid the post is too and he writes very visually. I felt like I was there when those two boys checked you out.
Liska xx

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Hannah 10th April 2016 - 1:01 pm

I’ve been pleasantly surprised by the responses on this post. Although I think it’s lovely, I didn’t expect everyone to see how he really feels through his writing. I think it’s given him the writing bug a little. He’s always thinking of the next video idea or something like that but now he has post ideas, so welcome to my world. You know the times when you just have to write things down before you forget! Wow, 28 years?! that’s amazing. You were so young when you got together, that is pretty incredible in itself. Thanks as ever for reading and for your comment 🙂 xx

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